Are Women Really Human?

OK, lookit.  I realize that there are a TON of women who read these articles.  So before I even open up the proverbial “can of worms” that the title of this particular one implies, I want everyone to know up front that it’s a RHETORICAL QUESTION.

So hang with me.  Deal?

With that out of the way, I have to say I was in the mood to stir the pot today.

And without a doubt, asking such a ridiculous question accomplishes that goal.

But the more I talk to guys all over the world, the more I realize how much we as guys really need to ask ourselves stuff like this.

I mean sure, all but the most psychopathic and pathologically misguided of us as guys fully understand, at least at the conscious level, that women are homo sapiens  just like we are.

But are we OKAY with that?

And are we GLAD about that?

What do you mean, Scot?

Well, it’s just that very often what we DO appears to challenge what we’d SAY we think is true about men and women being equally “human”.

For starters, a lot of what I see written out there appears to presuppose that we see women as the “enemy”.

Such dating advice comes from an “us vs. them” mentality where MOTOS (members of the opposite sex) require some sort of trickery and/or manipulation in order for them to “comply” with our desires.

Think “Seduce And Conquer” a la Tom Cruise’s character in that weird Magnolia flick, and you’re on the right track here.

Now, we instinctively know that none of that crap would work on US, yet we remain convinced that women would somehow respond more positively to it than we would.

That can only be because they’re some sort of non-human life form whose mind works differently from ours.

And by the way, this appears to be a concept that’s NOT gender-specific.  Lots of “lady gurus” out there are busy teaching women how to trick men into marrying them, and so forth.

So you could definitely say that there are plenty of women out there also who legitimately need to ask themselves if they believe MEN are really human.

It’s all rather ironic, isn’t it?

After all, the simple fact that BOTH men AND women go around operating as if the opposite gender is a different species from their own itself points to the fact that we probably think more ALIKE than DIFFERENTLY…and are therefore probably of a similar class of mammals after all.

But hey…who wants to think that hard on a weekend?

Back to the main point.  Here’s something else to think about.

It really appears to be almost universal that we think of relationships in terms of getting what WE want.

The question then becomes a matter of how we can get a woman to satisfy OUR needs.

Again, this proves that we aren’t quite considering women to be as human as we are…at least consciously.

Were that the case, we’d obviously spend more time figuring out how to represent ourselves to another human being as the solution to what SHE wants.

After all, we already know that when a woman seems to us like she’s our “dream woman” we’re unbelievably (and perhaps even irrationally) attracted to her.

So who’s zooming who here?  If women are human also, then it follows logically that they have “dreams” also.

And if she’s in fact as human as postulated herein, you can bet your shorts that her “dream” isn’t to meet all of your needs with none of hers having been met…right?

Simply put…the BEST way to attract women is to recognize that their attraction mechanism works EXACTLY like ours does.

That sounds like a reasonable assumption, no?

And guess what? In case it’s not self-evident at this point, THAT whole line of thinking isn’t a gender specific one either.

Women who care not to recognize that we as guys don’t really find being “monopulated” exciting don’t generally succeed in the dating world either…even as they wonder how to figure our “species” out.  Hmmm…

About now you may be thinking you’ve got it all handled in this department…and if so, that’s outstanding.

Because believe me, if you really, truly are past the first two ideas I’ve thrown on the table here you’re WAY ahead of 95% of the dating pool.

But wait…there’s more.  And this last bit of info could really be the “kicker”.

What’s the most frequent scenario that causes us as guys to suppose women must me something OTHER than “human”?

That’s when we feel REJECTED by women.

As in ALL of them.

This isn’t only the most frequent cause of this particular mindset, it’s also the DARKEST.

Why is that?

Here’s the deal.

Whenever we find ourselves striking out time after time when we attempt to approach and relate to women, we find ourselves in a seriously UNCOMFORTABLE position.

Well, duh.  Right?

I mean, who LIKES repeated DISAPPROVAL by women…especially by women we’d LOVE to approve of us?

Human nature all but dictates that when we feel pain we find some way to GET RID of it…or at least lessen the sting a bit.

And how do we do that?  By OFFLOADING the “blame” from ourselves.

Think about it.  Being the “victim” instead of taking responsibility for our own hurt really does work as a temporary “band-aid”, doesn’t it?

So then, when we find that women don’t respond to us the way we’d like, the easy way out is to make it THEIR problem.

Women are “crazy”.  Women are “flaky”.  Women “don’t know what they want”.  Women “can’t be trusted”.  Women “like to reject men”.

“Women…you can’t live with ‘em, and you can’t shoot ‘em.”

Ah…the tell-tall words of a man who truly fails to see the similarities between men and women.  That is, the HUMAN ones.

Meanwhile, don’t kid yourself.  Women all over the world are bemoaning the fact that they “can’t find a decent man”…even though they’ve just said “maybe not” to about ten of us in a row.

And that might be the SAME woman who’d recently gone through a string of about half a dozen guys who “loved her and left her”.

For her, the “protection mechanism” is the same as it is for us as guys:  It’s MEN who have the problem, sub-human species such that they are.

But here’s the crazy part.  Neither men nor women end up any closer to building high-quality relationships with MOTOS by thinking that way.

In fact, the OPPOSITE is true, tragically.

And that, my friends, is where this conversation comes full-circle.

So many of us—men and women—are so busy trying to get what we want at the expense of those we’d love to love us that we don’t even realize the extent of how much MOTOS are repulsed by the idea of NOT getting what THEY want.

Meanwhile, it’s fascinating to me the correlation between being a “Big Four” human being (confident, sexually polarized as masculine man or feminine woman, able to make MOTOS feel secure with you, strong character) and having no problem recognizing MOTOS as fully human…just as ourselves.

And those people—male or female—tend to be the ones who succeed at dating and relationships.